"What's My Kink"

"Kinky sex is like religion, there are many different ways to get to the mountain top..."

Joe Lust

In a country where we spend our meaningless existence's watching the latest Reality Show, how long do you think it will be before "What's My Kink?" hits the FOX network?

Of course people will tire of watching idiots eat worms, in an attempt to gain their fifteen minutes of fame--the 16th minute is spent in a bathroom puking--and will demand something a little more taboo, say, making your girlfriend, who is really your daughter, whack a horse for all to see. Hey, this shit happens! Don't believe me? Check out the porn sites, they've got it all.

And pretty soon, because they have it all, TV is going to suffer, already has, regardless of how many Brady Bunch reunions the networks air, and when they suffer they are going to have to compete with the net>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

And that means we are going to be subjected to shit that not even Satan himself would enjoy.

So you say you're not ready to see a VW full of circus midgets climb out of their car and gang bang an aging sitcom star (pick your fav), because aging sitcom star can't get arrested? nor a gig on Celebrity Boxing...

How about not, Queer as Folk, but Hermaphrodite as All Hell, a show where you'll have to watch the "normal" day-to-day existence of a group of cross-pollinated pals who open a espresso bar in Seattle and go about business as usual; which just may include them screwing themselves with their own penises.

Lenny Bruce said it a long time ago: The day will come when the whole neighborhood will have video cameras in their homes and be broadcasting their sagas--no matter how sick they are--for everyone to see. Warning, Will Robinson: The Osbournes is only the tip of the iceberg.

And may I suggest if you
have a problem with this warped societal phenomenon, number 1) Joe Lust likes you already, and 2) How about finding a nice island somewhere where women are women, and men or men, and you can sit on the beach and read a good book, and not have to tune into the latest whores (read: television networks) and be subjected to their idea of Must-See TV.

Okay, now I ask myself the same question as you are: What the hell is this rant all about??? And I think I've got it: Even though kinky sex is like religion--there are many different ways to get to the mountain top--keep your "religion" to your sick-mo-fo self...unless it involves playing nude leap frog with the Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders and I am invited.

Hey, I know you need attention, and I am sure you will get your sweetheart TV deal, but I don't need to know that you can stick coke bottles up your ass, or balance cinder blocks on your dick, or get banged by a dog, because frankly my dear, I don't give a damn.

Find more HMC's in the:

Tell a Friend About Us

And now a message from, not only a member of the HMC, but also our president, Joe Lust:

Hello Kids, have fun getting your lust on today? We're so happy, we tingle.

We'd even tingle more if you spread the word of gospel about us.

G'head, Why not tell a horny friend about us? Like they don't already know you're fucking horny??

Get over it, the secret's out, you are forever a member and there is no escape. Now start shouting it from the roof top.

And don't be scared to drop in and ask Joe a question from time to time...as long as it isn't to drop the soap.

Question or Comments for Joe?

© 2000-2001 Comedy Avenue Production. All rights reserved.